Christian Living, Life

i am a hypocrite

I’ve always been a very self-aware person. When I’m feeling depressed, I know pretty much exactly why. When I’m angry, I know the reason. When I’m hurt, I know the cause. When it comes to whatever I say, do, and feel, I’m rarely confused.

So when I say that I am a hypocrite, I mean it. And here’s why:

I’m a hypocrite because I said that all those women claiming to be raped by Bill Cosby were just gold-diggers. But now, knowing what it feels like, I can’t say for sure anymore.

I’m a hypocrite because I tell people skin color doesn’t matter, yet black girls aren’t “my type.” Not because I think they’re less than human; but because that’s just who I am. Though, that’s not to say I won’t one day fall in love with a beautiful African American girl.

I’m a hypocrite because I tell my students to read their Bibles and pray every day, but I can barely get myself to read more than a chapter.

I’m a hypocrite because I tell people not to let what they’re going through define them, but I still struggle with feelings of worthlessness and hopelessness and loneliness every day.

I’m a hypocrite because my body is a temple, but I still struggle with self-harm.

I’m a hypocrite because I believe the things I do, but I act like I don’t.

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But let’s face it, we’re all hypocrites. Every. One. Of. Us.

We all hold onto some sort of belief. Whether it’s God or self. Whatever it is, we all do and say and feel things that go against those beliefs.

I think sometimes we forget that we’re not superhuman. We will struggle. We will fall. It’s wrong to think that somehow, because we believe in a certain something, we will magically overcome all these things.

Hypocrisy is in our nature. Everyone is a hypocrite.

I get tired of Atheists’ main arguments being that Christians are hypocrites. It’s a valid argument – because it’s true – but it doesn’t discredit God.

I think the fact that I am aware of and acknowledge my hypocrisy does more to prove that God is real than I think.

To you who know you’re hypocrites: keep fighting. Because the struggle of today is nothing compared to the glory we shall receive. Don’t be ashamed that you’re not superhuman. Allow your struggle to illuminate who you are in Christ.

To you who think you’re not hypocrites: nobody’s perfect. Perfection is a feat achieved by only one Man in all of history. So, unless you’re the Messiah come back, you are a hypocrite. Maybe not Pharisaical, but still.

Let’s all remember that hypocrisy is our inherent nature. But through Christ, there is hope for something better.

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